FrankPhoto4Today, March 14, is Kay’s and my 49th Anniversary! Yes, it’s not possible to be married for almost half a century to such a wonderful and talented woman, but it happened by the grace of God.

Since we have both been spending almost all of our non-committed time to writing novels, it got me wondering about how important writing has been to our marriage, and the answer is VERY! Here’s how.

WRITING ABOUT EACH OTHER.  Soon after we got engaged, I wrote a poem for Kay entitled The Passion of the Nero Stallion. I’ll post it on my site in the near future. About fifteen or twenty years ago, I had a beautiful dream about her and wrote my remembrance of the dream in The Lady and the Tower. Maybe I’ll post that one. too. I also wrote a fictional (but with real elements) story about Kay in college and soon thereafter called In Praise of Mrs. White (DiBianca means “of white”). There are other things I’ve written to express my love for Kay, but these are the main ones.

Kay tells me she models some of her ideas and characters on things we have discussed and my personal characteristics. I’m not sure why acquisition editors aren’t throwing her stuff out the window. In fact, her first novel, The Watch on the Fencepost, has sold over four hundred books in the first three weeks since it was released! It also won a medal in The Illumination Awards and received recognition as a semi-finalist in the ACFW Genesis Contest.

HELPING EACH OTHER IN OUR NEW WRITING “CAREERS.”  We help each other continually with our manuscripts and in many other ways. Here are some of them.

Plot discussions.  Making the story “right” and compelling is the most important part of writing fiction. We constantly discuss aspects of each other’s drafts. Our spouse’s fingerprints are all over our final work and that much better for it.

Pre-editing and reviewing. We pre-edit, i.e., read, correct, and critique, every version (and usually sub-version—Ooo, that’s funny) of each other’s manuscripts before submitting them to our respective editors—who are most talented.

Collateral aspects of writing. We go together to writing conferences, writers group meetings, book signings, and other writing-related functions, assisting as needed. We help each other to develop our websites, blogs, ads, and other means of book promotion (Kay started first and is a computer scientist, as well, so she’s helping me more than I her at this point.

Cross-pollination. We are continually passing on to each other new information we come across about writing conferences, contests, books, articles, etc.

This should give you an idea about how much it helps to have a spouse or other relative or friend with whom you can partner in your writing endeavors. Good Luck!

Thank You, Kay, and